Session 37 — The Lawyer, the Junk Stone, and the Beast of the Woods

Session Recap

A whole day of errands in Ponterford with no combat — the morning after the owl's dinner, on the 28th of Spring's End (two days short of the full moon). The party wakes in the rented old Falconer house beside the now-silenced drake skeleton and sets out to close their open promises: finish the frog-folk quest, check in with the witch church now that they're "friends of everybody," and decide what to do about the town. The frog-folk problem gets a lawyer's answer. Through the village's only legal man, Edgar Wiley, they learn the loggers cut King Ringo's trees illegally — the guards simply ignore it, swallowing the loggers' absurd "the tree drew a knife, it was self-defence" claims — and that the fix is to fence the frog-folk's land and have Edgar file a change-of-use deed so any logger inside becomes a trespasser. King Ringo agrees to pay for the deed if the party builds the fence; they buy ~55 gold of lumber and commit Magra and Fenric (both woodcarvers), plus the freed orc Algrimmar and Thalia's thorn-vines, to the two-week build.

Along the way Lash has a "birthday," donates a gnome skull to a roadside junk stone, and gets Edgar to draw up her last will and an adoption certificate for Salamandine. At the witch church, the Covenite summons the party back at midnight tonight — the bells will ring once for them alone — to meet, face to face, the one soul the church needs help for. With time to kill, the group visits the orc hunting lodge to check on Algrimmar, and walks straight into a new quest: the senior orc Varg Ralagrak Gro-Algrag charges them to slay a Beast of the Woods, a poison-breathing horror 5–8 miles off that turns travellers into bursting pustules. A Detect Thoughts on its dying victim reveals a 10-foot, four-tendrilled, dirt-cloud-hunting monster — and the medicine woman needs its venom sac to save the patient. The session ends as the party preps to march into the woods. Still level 6.

Key Events

• Morning at the Falconer house. The party (minus the absent rest of the roster) wakes after the long rest; the drake skeleton stayed silent all night. Lash's Goodberry cookies give everyone 4 temp HP with no death involved; Silithane pre-burned a Sending to his Gwyndinas contact so he can write the reply over downtime. The GM dates the day the 28th of Spring's End.
• Setting the day's tasks. Lash reads out the list: finish the frog-folk quest (stop the lumbering of their trees), check the "screaming trees," and report back to the witch. The group debates whether to turn Ponterford toward the Reclamation or simply choke off Laewendas's lumber — and settles that a secret rebellion beats an open one (the town is too cowed; openly removing the mayor would just bring Laewendas's army). Per the guard captain's warning, Lash agrees to stop claiming she's a child (any whisper of a child risks a fresh snatcher), and declares it her "18th birthday" instead; Thalia makes her a flower crown, Magra knits her a satchel.
• The screaming-plants lore. Fenric, as a Mage's Society man, confirms (Arcana 18) the owl's teaching: all plants are alive and sentient — Speak with Plants doesn't grant a voice, it just lets you hear one that was always there. Their houses are the dead bodies of murdered trees; living wood would scream, dead wood merely "was once alive." Jex chases the grim corollary — are the wooden houses "screaming corpses"? — and the GM confirms the timber is only dead-but-once-alive. Pure horror-comedy that deepens Lash's ethical crisis.
• Window-shopping the village. Hunting for the lawyer, the party peers into homes: a green-clothed herbalist rocking a cradle (implying an illegal child — almost certainly the druid neighbour of Session 35); giant 3×6-ft radishes; the rich elven wizard Malgamar's wine-stocked house; the pottery shop (a rough woodsman buys a gravy jug); a trading-card store; Norman the woodworker's shop; and a rabbit-woman sealing and launching a fishing boat, shooting fish with wooden arrows.
• The Junk Stone. At the edge of town the woodsman lays his new gravy jug on a roadside altar of random junk — broom-sticks, bent needles, goat-shoes, a leaky patched bucket. Lash investigates (Religion 3, no idea) and meets its keeper, Victus the Mute ("I was mute, but they cured me — I kept the name"). Lash donates the gnome skull taken from the necromancer's boat where Kain vanished; Fenric adds Thalia's old "I owe you one favour" note (signed in Kain's name — "a favour of a dead man").
• Edgar Wiley, the lawyer. They finally find Edgar Wiley — a half-fox/half-wolf beastfolk "highly trained in lorecraft" — after he finishes advising Malgamar. His verdict on the frog-folk: the loggers legally may fell trees on land they own, but the frog-folk own the river and 15–20 ft of its old course (the river has since meandered; ownership stayed put), so the cutting is trespass and theft. The guards ignore it (racial bias against beastfolk; the mill pays the town's wages) and rubber-stamp the loggers' "a tree drew a knife on us" self-defence claims. The fix (Jex floats the fence; Edgar confirms the legal precedent): build a fence and let him file a change-of-use deed marking the land private, so any logger inside is a trespasser with no self-defence cover. He offers King Ringo a hefty discount out of spite for the loggers, and recommends Norman to build it.
• Lash's paperwork. Edgar draws up Lash's last will and testament (the 900-gold owl IOU is paid off first, the rest to the party) and an adoption certificate making Salamandine officially her pet — 4 silver total. Fenric clears King Ringo's outstanding 3-copper legal debt to Edgar. The lawyer also raises Jex registering as a person (lab-made, she legally "doesn't exist") — to be unregistered is to be unprotected, unable to own land or pets, and impossible to imprison; Jax declines for now. Edgar notes the postal trade is illegal under Laewendas, so Thalia must take care not to be mistaken for a postwoman.
• King Ringo's decrees. The party reports to the frog-king, who decrees that if they build the fence, he will pay for the change-of-use deed (a ~40-gold debt his dirt-poor people will work off slowly). He ceremonially "knights" Fenric (whom he calls "the cat man") — dubbing him "legally distinct from knighted." He maps the fence line along the old river bend, excluding his own hut and the public dock.
• Buying the fence. With two woodcarvers in the group, Magra and Fenric take the two-week fence build as their downtime activity (Lash crafts at night; Thalia will add living Druidcraft thorns and climbing vines, and the privacy fence will also muffle the mill). At the mill they buy offcut lumber from a worker (Jackie Weaver, eating a fish sandwich), Fenric dodging the canned tomato juice with a fake allergy. ~250 ft of fence (≈44 panels, 45 posts) costs about 55 gold all in (~8 gold each); Fenric fronts it. The fence "doesn't exist" until the downtime is spent.
• The witch's midnight summons. At the church, Lash reports the fence plan and the deed to the Covenite. The Covenite says the church needs help with one thing she cannot put in her own words — and bids the party return tonight at midnight, when the bells ring once and the doors open for them alone, to hear the request directly from the one who needs it: someone whose heart has been broken before by groups who promised help and failed. (Valmora has two pre-claimed "friends" here — joke-named the Witchkeeper "Kevin Knight" and the Covenite "Cara Knight.") A very long man, "Stretch," waves from the pews.
• The orc hunting lodge. Killing time, the party visits the orc lodge to check on Algrimmar. The door-guard Bor-Grogus softens at the sight of half-orc Magra and welcomes them ("our food is your food, our swords are your swords"). Inside: a medicine woman in chainmail tending a woman covered in oozing pustules; ogre-sized spell scrolls on high shelves (trophies — the orcs apparently slew a spellcasting ogre, perhaps one of Laewendas's giant "generals" terrorising a place ~25 miles off); and Algrimmar, freed and grateful, who agrees to help dig the fence holes. The orcs woefully apologise to Magra on learning her elf mother married her orc father — to them, a 700-year elf "grooming" a 60-year orc — and explain orc history: dehumanised and bred as slave labour by the ancient human empire, they fight to never let it happen again, and carry one long unique name each (no surnames; Magra has "Greysong" only because she's half-orc).
• The Beast-of-the-Woods quest. The senior orc Varg Ralagrak Gro-Algrag — an ancient, fire-scarred veteran from before Laewendas — will only give the quest if Magra says the words: "I wish to slay the Beast of the Woods." A poison-breathing beast 5–8 miles off has been turning travellers into bursting blisters; the lodge has too few warriors after the rebellion. He tests the party with a palm-strike (Magra's hammer does 11; his flat damage reduction eats most of it) and is reluctant to let the tiny "birthday child" Lash come, though she proves her swing. Meads all round; they march at his side.
• Reading the victim's mind. To learn what they face, the medicine woman rubs a clarifying ointment on the dying patient's eyes and Silithane casts Detect Thoughts. Her memory: four unarmed travellers off-road in the woods; a sudden dirt cloud thumped up from the ground; screams as the beast — 10–12 ft tall, four spiked tendrils, a fat rounded head — snatched and crushed them; one glancing tendril swat sent her tumbling down a hill, and the venom is killing her by inches. It fell a group of four travellers in six seconds — three snatched and crushed, only the patient (the fourth) surviving, and barely. The cure is the beast's venom sac beneath its neck. Lash (Venatori-trained, Nature 6) doesn't recognise it — encouragingly, it's not from the Veilwood (where nothing is below level 8).
• The fool's-gold-leaf tell. Asked about useful herbs, the medicine woman tests Thalia with a whistle; Thalia (Nature 20) names fool's gold leaf, a rare plant that mimics edible gold leaf but "kills the shit out of you." The orc lies (badly) that misharvesting would spoil her supply — her three back-to-back Insight checks give her away. Thalia agrees to flag it with a red stick to gather later.

Combat & Encounters

• No combat this session. The whole day was errands and setup; the Beast of the Woods is teed up as next session's fight — a genuinely dangerous foe (poison that liquefies you on a glancing blow, intelligence enough to ambush from a dirt cloud, crushing tendrils). The party will fight it alongside the senior orc and possibly Algrimmar (bow only).
• No level-up, no bounty. Still level 6; no pip awarded.

NPCs & Factions

• Edgar Wiley (new) — Ponterford's lone lawyer ("Mr. Wiley," a half-fox/half-wolf beastfolk trained in lorecraft); pet-friendly office at the bottom of the hill. Lays out the frog-folk land law, offers the discounted change-of-use deed, and draws up Lash's will and Salamandine's adoption papers. A trust-based, honourable man frustrated by the loggers' "flagrant transgressions." See Edgar Wy.
• King Ringo — the frog-king commissions the fence in exchange for paying the change-of-use deed, and ceremonially "knights" Fenric ("legally distinct from knighted").
• The Covenite — summons the party to a midnight meeting at the church to meet the heart-broken soul the church needs help for; reiterates that the dead snatcher must stay secret.
• Algrimmar — the freed orc, now lodging at the orc hunting lodge; volunteers to help dig the fence. Reveals the orcs also lost children (and warriors) to the horsemen.
• Belbermont (new) — the elephant-folk acting mayor of Ponterford, who also owns the lumber mill and was installed by Laewendas to ship war-wood to Cathalon; the reason the guards ignore the frog-folk's law. Never appears on screen. See Belbermont.
• The orc hunting lodge orcs (new) — Bor-Grogus, the shirtless, Greek-statue door guard; Varg Ralagrak Gro-Algrag, the ancient, fire-scarred quest-giver with flat damage reduction; and the young chainmail-clad medicine woman tending the beast's victim (and secretly gathering fool's-gold leaf). See The Orc Hunting Lodge.
• The Beast of the Woods (new) — an unnamed, intelligent, poison-breathing horror 5–8 miles into the woods; ambushes from a self-made dirt cloud, four spiked tendrils, ~10–12 ft, and a venom that festers victims into bursting pustules. See The Beast of the Woods.
• Victus the Mute — the keeper of the roadside junk stone ("I was mute, but they cured me, I kept the name"); a one-scene oddity of Ponterford's folk customs.
• Malgamar — the rude elven wizard (of the dead Speak Moderately tavern, Session 33) appears in person, consulting Edgar on "the lore" and casting magic the party finds suspiciously high-level for a man reputed incompetent.
• The Snatcher — re-confirmed dead (recapped at session open: the wandering trio killed it with the wand-animated drake skeleton); the orcs, too, lost children to "the horsemen."
• Facey — named by Edgar as "Schniepel," head of the guard, tied with the sheriff below the mayor — corroborating the bard's mocking rhyme for the captain's real name.

Locations

• Ponterford — much of the residential southern district mapped: Edgar Wiley's law office, Norman's woodworker shop, a trading-card store, the pottery shop, Malgamar's wine-stocked house, the herbalist's cradle-house, the giant-vegetable gardens, the rabbit-woman's fishing dock, the roadside junk stone, and the orc hunting lodge on the steep north edge.
• The Orc Hunting Lodge (new) — the orcs' home on the worst (cliff-edge, steep-hill) plot in town: a thatched single-storey hall with a kitchen, storage of ogre-trophy scrolls, makeshift bunks, and an open-door welcome to any friend of an orc. A quest hub (slay the Beast of the Woods) and the place Algrimmar now lives.
• The frog-folk's land — defined legally for the first time: the river plus 15–20 ft of its old course (where it ran when the village was founded), their hut included but the public dock excluded — the parcel the new fence will enclose.

Loot, Items & Rewards

• Lash's last will & testament — drawn up by Edgar; the 900-gold owl IOU is settled first, the remainder to the party.
• Salamandine's adoption certificate — Salamandine is now legally Lash's pet (4 silver for both documents).
• Ogre-sized spell scrolls (seen, not taken) — two enormous scrolls in the orc lodge, war-trophies from a slain spellcasting ogre; Silithane could theoretically use one, but reading it would mean unfurling it from a roof and standing half a mile back ("like reading a spell off a beach towel").
• Fence materials — ~55 gold of lumber, posts and nails bought from the mill; the fence itself is built during the coming downtime.
• No bounty, no pip; still level 6.

Decisions & Open Threads

• Slay the Beast of the Woods. The session's cliffhanger: a deadly poison-monster hunt, undertaken to honour Algrimmar's lodge and to harvest the venom sac that can save the orc medicine woman's dying patient. Preparation (antivenoms, poison resistance) is strongly advised.
• The midnight church meeting. Tonight at midnight the party meets — alone, by the bells — the heart-broken soul the witch church needs help for; the Covenite asks them to consider it deeply before accepting.
• The frog-folk fence. Build the fence (Magra, Fenric, Algrimmar, +Thalia's thorns) over the two-week downtime; King Ringo then pays Edgar for the change-of-use deed, completing the third and last frog-folk task and the witch's good-deed slate.
• The dragon hand-in, still pending. The silenced drake skeleton's bounty (to Sheriff Jeremiah Falconer and Dominus) waits on Valmora confirming it stays dead; the banked pip rides on the dragon and town-help hand-ins.
• The fool's-gold leaf. Why the orc medicine woman is quietly hoarding a deadly look-alike poison is an unflagged thread; Thalia means to mark and later gather it.
• Turn the town, quietly. The party leans toward a covert pro-Reclamation tilt rather than openly toppling the Laewendas-installed mayor Belbermont — the mill that arms Cathalon remains the strategic prize.
• Where next. After Ponterford the heading is still loose; the GM's prep points toward a Druid's Grove near the Veilwood (also staged for the parallel "Red Group") and, eventually, the assault on Laewendas.
• Carryover: Jex's legal non-existence (declined registration) and her ultra-arrow; Otto's package and Thalia's oath; the red-candle tomb / 14-ft coffin (Session 24) and Valmora's dead-gods quarry; the imprisoned Caressa and the cave's deferred loot; the missing mothers; the longer heading to the Veilwood.
• Roster. On-screen: Thalia, Silithane, Lash, Magra, Fenric, Valmora, Jex — plus Salamandine and Silithane's crow. The rest of the group remains absent (and must return before the party levels); Ashlyn is recalled to the Veilwood, Draak is gone. Still level 6.

Memorable Moments

• "Are we living in screaming corpses?" Jex chasing the owl's lesson to its grim end (off Fenric's Arcana 18), the GM confirming the house "is not screaming because all the wood it's made of is from murdered plants" — you're merely living in their dead bodies.
• The junk stone. An entire roadside religion of pointless garbage, tended by Victus the (formerly) Mute, who keeps the name out of habit — and a party that solemnly donates a gnome skull and a dead man's worthless favour to it.
• "Legally distinct from knighted." King Ringo tapping Fenric's shoulders with his staff and bestowing the one honour a frog-king is legally allowed to give.
• British directions. A whole town built on three hills and one lawyer's house that every single party member walks past, twice, while arguing which side of the bridge to use.
• The grooming apology. Four orcs gravely laying hands on Magra's shoulders to mourn that her 700-year-old elf mother married her 60-year-old orc father — "the difference in those creatures is incredible."
• "I wish to slay the Beast of the Woods." The senior orc refusing to hand over the quest until Magra says the exact words and means them — and the table failing, repeatedly, to make Mia sound sincere.
• The beach-towel scroll. Ogre-sized spell scrolls so vast that Silithane could only read one by lying on a rooftop while someone unfurls it half a mile away.
• Cat's cradle and a widow's grief. While the rest of the party spends a full in-game hour failing to find the law office one house away, Valmora and Thalia share a quiet heart-to-heart on the riverbank (and learn cat's cradle) — Valmora's long-dead human husband surfacing only because Thalia thought to ask, "one of the only appropriate ways" to raise him.